It’s not easy to be independent and a woman in my industry ( public relations). My fight is more complex than most. Taking no and giving up is not an option; be Open-minded and learn from others. You have to work smart and understand you need a team. I had to learn how to work with others, and some days, it’s a struggle. You have to be strong-minded and be prepared to get embarrassed. My first embarrassing moment in the field was my encounter with the apparel buyer for Bloomingdales. I was making sales calls to department stores in the New York area. When I called the buyer from Bloomingdales, she asked why you called my cell and started yelling about me not being respectful of her personal space. That day I could have given up, but my situation taught me how to be strong.
My name is Anushka Garcia and being an independent women to me starts in the mind and translates to all aspects of your life. It’s the freedom to make your own decisions and control your own narrative without outside interference. It’s being confident in yourself and your goals without validation. It’s standing up for yourself and others even if the world says to sit down. It’s also the ability to say “ You know what I’m going to do that even if I have to it alone” but also having the wisdom to ask for help to get to the next level.
A lot of times when women speak of independence it solely encompasses finances. I make my own money, I pay my own bills and I don’t need to rely on anyone. For a long time that’s solely what being an independent women meant to me as well. After all money is the key that unlocks many experiences, and the thought of relying on someone for my survival terrifies me. However as I’ve grown I realized that’s just the surface. You can be an independent women long before acquiring money (Which you will because of having that mind set)
If I could go back and talk to my younger self I would tell her not to be afraid to shine. I would tell her to stop being comfortable so other people aren’t uncomfortable. Don’t be in spaces where who you aren’t celebrated. That’s super important because u feel like you don’t belong in general, when you really just need to be in a safe place. It’s cliché to say but I’d also tell her those your stressing out about and those people won’t matter in a few years. You and your son are gonna be ok..
“When I think of my independence as a woman, it only makes sense to highlight my dependency on the lord. “I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the Lord, which made heaven and earth.” Psalm 121:1-2. There are so many unknowns in our world. It is not until we are exposed to them; that we truly know how we may face them. Knowing that I serve a compassionate, loving, and faithful God. Makes all the unknown possible to explore. The Websters definition of Independent is: 1.) having enough money to support oneself without help from others. 2.) not subject to control by others, self- governing. To me, that is a narrow perspective of the components of what it means to be independent. Being an independent women means the ability to advocate for myself, to seek the resources necessary to sustain a balanced life, and most importantly knowing when to ask for help and take it. Standing strong in Self.
One thing I would love to tell my younger self is: Be patient, with life and with yourself. You only have one life to live. You do not know it all, trust the plan that God has for you. “A man’s heart deviseth his way: but the Lord directeth his steps.” Proverbs 16:9 KJV. Continue to embrace the hardships of life, that it may mold you into a bright diamond. To be a true testament that you are a light created by God. “But he answered and said, It is written, Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God.” Matthew 4:4 KJV
An independent woman loves herself first and foremost. She is kind but assertive, and passionate about the people and causes closest to her. Being an independent woman means to me that you are comfortable in your own skin and forgive yourself on the days where you may feel less than.
An independent woman takes care of her own needs and supports herself, but also knows that it is ok to ask for help. Too often I find myself shying away from asking for help, but this is not a sign of weakness for an independent woman. We all need to help each other in this life when possible.
If I could talk to my teenage self now, I would tell her she is beautiful and strong. That she shouldn’t dim her light to allow others to be more successful, because she is more than enough and more than capable. I would also tell her that it’s ok to be single, that you aren’t going to be defined by your partner and to not stress it too much haha. Sending so much love to my younger self and to all the independent women out there!”
Grace Kwan Seghini she/her
To me, being an independent woman doesn’t mean I have to have it all, or do everything on my own without assistance. To me, it means knowing I can achieve anything myself and always working to make myself better. I grew up with divorced parents so I personally know first hand what single mothers deal with, which makes me feel insanely blessed that I was able to have a mother like mine. There are so many positive and inspirational things I can say about my mom; WHAT A WOMAN! She is the reason for all of my life success, as well as why I view things the way I do. She has four girls she has had to take care of by herself for 20 years now and I can tell you she has done a damn good job of it. There was never a time we didn’t get to participate in anything, and she was always buying us the latest styles and trends. She is the definition of an Independent woman and truly why it mean so much to me and my sisters. Ever since I was little I was always told “you can do anything you set your mine to Hannah”, and my mom being my main support, my rock, and biggest fan is what has kept me going during the hard times. To me, the label “Independent woman” means so much more than a girl doing it all on her own. It means success; it means struggles; it means feeling like you did something good for your short amount of time on this earth. I want to be independent to make myself proud and not to be seen as a badass infant of men or even other woman. I do this so at the end of the day I can be happy with my progress, and to encourage everyone around me that the only thing stopping you from your dreams is yourself.
Independent means for something or someone not to depend on another for livelihood. A few years ago if someone asked me what an independent woman was, I’d simply say a woman who can fend for herself. Today, I would describe an independent woman as a woman who shows up for not only herself but for others. A woman who views other women as a partner and not as competition. A women learning that her happiness is 100% her responsibility and everything else is extra. An independent woman isn’t fearful of being alone, she is confident and comfortable within herself and she enjoys her own company. She has her goals and she makes and sticks to the plan to achieve those goals. Knowing what I know now I would tell my younger self to learn to put you first. We get so wrapped up in making others happy because we simply want them in our lives that we ignore ourselves to please them. I forgot that I matter just as much as my loved ones if not more. So to younger Kristen, take into consideration your own needs and feelings without belittling others. This allows you to be more productive and organized. Loving yourself a little more is necessary not selfish.
Being an independent black woman means knowing your worth even if the world doesn’t. It means putting yourself first, doing what makes you happy and walking in the image of God. Learning this has taught me to accept my flaws and to move with intention.
As an independent black woman I always knew I wanted to create a legacy that I would be proud of. I learned to go for any and every dream your heart desires. Even when you feel boxed in it’s okay to be kind and patient with yourself. Although my major is education, I love how being an entrepreneur makes me feel. Starting my brand BeautyLushLifestyle opened my eyes to many networking opportunities, and showed me that I can be my own boss! Knowing that I am creating generational wealth and breaking those barriers, makes it all worth it! Freeing yourself from the expectations of societal norms really propelled me into doing what brings me happiness and fulfillment. I love how I can make other women feel with the touch of my brand.
“Empowered women, empower women” is a quote I live by. It feels good to see women coming together and supporting each other. Looking back, I would tell my younger self to be fearless and resilient. To always bet on yourself and that you can do anything through hard work and preparation. Don’t be afraid to take risks! Also to uplift others around you, and give yourself the flowers you deserve, while you grow through it! Last but not least, an affirmation I currently live by is to Walk in the room like God sent you there!
Love & Light,
Angela of BeautyLushLifestyle.
Being an independent woman to me means that I constantly choose myself first before anyone else. I create boundaries and I’m not afraid to confidently speak up for what I believe is right. I can take care of myself, I acknowledge my emotions and I advocate for myself. To be independent is to be a leader. I am in competition with myself and I am constantly working on being a better me.
If I could tell my teenage self something it would be to continue to be your authentic, creative self. Don’t worry about the opinions of others in regards to you. Do what makes you happy and take a break before going to college. Love on yourself and remember anything worth having isn’t going to be easily attained, put in the work and stop being lazy. I would also tell her that it’s okay to be vulnerable and that there’s power in that. And to get rid of this thought process of always having to have it together and being strong, Kerry it’s okay to ask for help.